911 STAT... We've got a dog emergency!

But wait, I have a hair appointment first.

While on our morning walk, Ms. Princess Samantha Pants and Sir Rockafeller got into a scrap with another dog. Thank goodness there was a fence between them. However, as soon as I could pull their howling little bodies (damn them dogs are strong!) away, I noticed blood. Blood!

Ms. PSP had caught her adorable nose on the fence, a nail, something, and it is now bleeding. A whole heckofalot. The vet had two openings 10:10 and 3:30. I had a 9:30 hair appointment. Guess which option bad momma went with? Go on, guess.

Yup, bad momma put her darling Ms. PSP's health needs below her own beauty. Call the ASPCA animal cops on me, please.

But hey! I did manage to put some rubbing alcohol and antibiotic cream on it before I dashed out. No small feat, I tell you. I went throuh a half a box of Nutro Lite Biscuits to do it. Rocky was spastic, clawing at me to give more treats, barking at me even. And little Princess? Trying to bite me every time I got close enough her to try touching her. With one hand I was telling Rocky to sit-laydown-sit-laydown-sit-laydown, our calm down exercise, and with the other I was trying to ensare PSP so I could rub a q-tip on her nose. She would come close, then back off, close, then back off. I'd grap her collar, she'd wrestle out of my grasp and try to bite me. Then Rocky would scratch at me and whine. The PSP would come close for her treat. Then Rocky would bark. I'd go back to sit-laydown-sit with him. She would come close enough for me to get her collar, and we'd start all over again.

This went on for a solid half hour. If anyone was watching, they'd laugh themselves silly. But, if someone was home, they could have helped with her... or gone to the 10:10 appointment.

OK, I am still a bad momma. But I have to go to the vet now, Officers Lucas and Sandano can arrest me later.

Hi. My Name Is Dumb.

I think I have a problem. No, no, not the booze.

I've been doing everything this week to avoid writing my own press release. Today I've done nothing but read up on lead generation, lead flow and marketing ideas. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's all going to pay off down the road. However, I need to start generating some buzz. I just don't know where to start. I can rip out a press release on dog turds in ten minutes, but a pr about me? Nah-uh.

My daily routine is just that, routine. I walk the beasts, do some online stuff, read some business-y magazines and books, write down kernels of ideas, and stare at the dogs napping. By this time it's 10am. I need to shake things up a bit.

Next week is a networking event, thank the pants! I'm running short of sarcastic inspiration here.

yet another reason to have two beagles...

Today, this day, this glorious, wonderful day, I got a call from my friend Vicky at American Express. Yes, the American Express. We have AmEx car and home insurance and a Blue card. We like AmEx. Most of the time. Several months ago, say, in August, I had a teeny, tiny auto incident. It ended up taking over seven weeks to fix Russell, our lefty Subaru Outback Wagon. When it all came down, we owed a teeny, tiny bit more than our deductable for some tires and a rental. I complained. Got nutin. I complained again. Got more nutin. My wise mamma advised me to write a letter. So I wrote to AmEx insurance, AmEx consumer affairs and this teeny, tiny state agency called, the Colorado Division of Insurance. Hmm.

For over a month I got no response. Then, as if by magic, the Colorado Division of Insurance sent a letter to AmEx insurance demanding phone logs, responses to questions and all within 30 days. Hmm.

And today, this day, this glorious, wonderful day, Vicky called. She's not with the insurance side, she's with what we like to call, the "customer service" side. She apologized. She huffed and hawed with indignious disbelief that AmEx would treat customers this way, and then she said she would credit our rental costs to our Blue card. Hmm.

One thing led to another and soon we were talking about dogs. "Are you a dog person?" I asked. "Yes, I have two beagles," she responded. Two beagles!?! The chances? The odds?! The luck?! We discussed our darling beasts for several minutes and then she got back to business... "Well, I see the difference was $374, but why don't I credit you an even $500?" Yes, indeed. Why don't you? I could talk about beagles all day if that would get us a better credit.

Hmm.

Whew!

In the words of our esteemed leader, this web stuff is "hard work."

To my readers, friends and personalities, thanks for making the leap to this new blog. I have to shed good ol' monkey. Welcome to the new me. (curtsies)

Yesterday was my first full day as a bohemian. I wasn't quite sure what to do with myself. After hubby left for work at 7:15, I took the wild beasts for a walk. When I returned the the "office," made my am tea and started working. Uh, well, I started checking email, had a Monday morning meeting with my "team" and then started working. Wait, I didn't actually do any work yesterday.

Last week I worked hubby like a rented mule getting my new office in order. We hammered, painted, drilled, lifted, organized and drank our way to my more fung shui-ish office, complete with obligatory bamboo plant. Now I just needed some work to do in it.

Most of yesterday was wasted waiting for my new color printer to arrive. The driver came around 11 am, leaving most of the day wasted. I'm still stuck in that corporate mindset where I must be at my desk, be productive and ready to answer the phone. Gotta lose that.

So the next few posts are going to be about me trying to figure out just what the hell I'm doing, where I'm going during the day and who I am as a bohemian-at-large and deliberately unemployed person.

I'm taking suggestions.