still kickin'

Made it back from conference #1 in one piece. DC was beautiful, when it stopped raining. I adore mass transit and couldn't get enough of the metro, with a stop under my hotel, the city was my playground. If only I wasn't in sessions the whole time. It did throw me off my training schedule. I tried to sub running on a treadmill a few days, which was awesome! At 5 feet above sea level, I can run for miles without my lungs burning a hole through my chest. Even though it was 97% humidity, I could run and run like the devil was chasing me. Then I came home to Colorado and back to gasping for air after a mile.

Now I know you all can't get enough of the triathlon training talk. Oh no you can't. So there's more. I went on a ride today over to Cherry Creek State Park, where the tri will be held. It's about 3 miles to the park. I peddled around another six or so miles and made my way back home. The thing is, we live on a hill. Or rather, Cherry Creek is downhill from our house. Thus, it's uphill on the way back. No matter what route you take. And I've taken most of them by now. So when I'm tired and my legs are screaming for mercy, and the sweat trickles down in places we will not mention, I have to go uphill to get home. Oy.

And what does a sane person do after a 12+ mile ride? Sit? No! She gets off the bike and runs around the block. At one point the running slowed down to a limping crawl, but I went around the block.

I needed it, you see. I had a bad day yesterday. I blew up and was unkind to someone. Not the cursing, temper tantrum kind of blow up, mind you. I was (am?) a woman on the verge. Sending postcards from the edge, so to speak. I'm at the point where I need to run things through my head and work it out on my own time. Then a kind, yet very pushy, soul stepped in and started pushing my buttons. I tried to deflect, I tried to avoid. But she kept asking. And pushing. And prodding. As if her questions would help me at this point. The more she asked, the more pissed off I became. I know I should have been a grown up at the beginning and told her that I didn't want or need to talk about it at this point. But that's just too easy and adult of me. No. I tried to end the conversation as soon as possible, which made her push even more. Finanally I snapped. And then she understood. But it was too late. It was out. On the table. Where everyone stood and looked at it, wondering what it was and where it came from.

But the thing is, I felt so much better after I cried about it. So very much better. And in a moment of clarity I realized that my priorities are completely out of wack. That I've been putting too much energy in one place, and that I need to direct it in another. It became very clear that I'm heading in a direction I shouldn't be. And for that, for that pushy conversation, I am grateful.

End vague references. Back to biking. Must get bike shorts. Ouch. My tush.